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Day 81 - Simple Things, Simple Changes

October 11, 2018

As this story comes closer and closer to its conclusion I am looking back at the man I was when it began and the man that I have become during it.  The change has been incredible, truly life changing, and yet it has begun with something so simple, meeting 1 person a day for 100 days.  At its core it is so remarkably basic, and that is what has led to the greatest change of my life.  In truth this is the way the world works in general.  When we make the most basic changes we find the most profound impacts as a result.  By certain quirks of fate I was reminded of this fact by my connection with Stacey Crew.

 

I never had a good example of motherly energy in my life.  It simply wasn't there, but if I were able to conjure up my imagining of it I am certain Stacey would be the physical embodiment.  She is kind, warm, welcoming and gentle.  There is something incredibly loving about merely sitting a few feet across from her.  Honestly, I could sit here for hours and never notice.  Stacey is present, asking wonderful questions, listening to your answers and fully there.  It shows how much she values people and relationships, how much she can see the beauty in people, possibly even when they can't see it in themselves.  This all culminates in her smile; simply put it is just joy, comforting, intelligent and warm.  I have been open to everyone in the 100, but it is so easy with Stacey that it is definitely remarkable.

 

Stacey is the mother of two daughters.  Her eyes glisten when she talks about them, forming pools of pride and joy, it's what I have always thought parents' eyes should look like.  She is passionate about them, understanding that it was not their role to glorify her, but her role to raise them and empower them to become the amazing people they are.  Honestly, as she talks about them I cannot help but want to meet them.  She left her corporate job about 2 years ago to pursue her passion, wellness.  She speaks about balance in the body and the mind, about how we can implement simple change to have something better, about her process and her drive.  Stacey is passionate about it, not for money, but for true service to others, it is amazing to see and hear.

 

We talk about those simple changes.  I tell her about my story, about the changes that have happened to me in just 81 days.  The people who have known me from before see a different person when they look at me now, an incredible transformation in so short a time.  Stacey knows about these changes.  She tells me about how these changes occur like this in all things, and they are the ones that make us the happiest.  Stacey speaks with a gentle wisdom, not from superiority but rather from knowing.  The way you would share something precious with a friend while winds whipped outside and the lights flickered.

 

Simple changes are important, but they must be done with consistency and true desire.  We talk about how you need to want to make a change, to truly desire the outcome.  In a world where we feel judged and looked at by others it can be hard to find that genuine want, to distinguish it from the appearance of the desire for change.  Stacey tells me that once we have that want, the next step is to be consistent, to work for the change.  I tell her about my writing practice, about the thousands of words I write every single day, whether they will be used in some grand project or not.  We cannot do things in short bursts, not writing, not exercise, not meaningful change.  Change isn't easy, nothing meaningful is, and Stacey knows this.  People like her, who have found and chased their passion, know all about the work for a change, about loving what you do, your life and your purpose.

 

Stacey and I spend our time well.  It is an investment I would make again and again, one I look forward to making again in the future.  We hug and walk out into the winds howling through Charleston today.  As we talked, my heart felt a bit higher because I could see in her eyes that Stacey was proud of me, of what I had accomplished.  Before now we were relative strangers, but she was proud and it showed.  Moments like that are the secret to loving people, they truly are.

 

Favorite Dinosaur:  Stegosaurus

Why:  Gentle herbivores, unique and kind.

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